Module Objectives:
- Critically analyse and evaluate your own communication style and its impact on various stakeholder groups within the school and wider community.
- Strategically apply advanced communication techniques to navigate complex interpersonal dynamics and foster shared understanding amongst diverse teams.
- Develop and implement proactive strategies to cultivate and maintain high levels of relational trust with staff, students, family, and external partners, even amidst challenging circumstances.
- Articulate the nuanced relationship between relational trust, effective communication, and their role in leading school-wide initiatives and fostering a positive school culture.
- Evaluate and apply relevant leadership frameworks and research to inform their approach to communication and trust-building within a leadership context.
As school leaders, you are pivotal in shaping the relational landscape of your school. This module challenges you to consider communication and trust through a strategic leadership lens.
Deepening Understanding of Communication Styles:
For school leaders, a nuanced understanding of communication involves:
- Contextual Agility: Recognising how different contexts necessitate adaptable communication approaches, considering power dynamics and potential sensitivities.
- Strategic Messaging: Crafting clear, consistent, and compelling messages aligned with the school’s vision and values.
- Active Listening and Inquiry: Employing sophisticated listening techniques to understand perspectives and facilitate constructive dialogue.
- Non-Verbal Communication and Presence: Cultivating a leadership presence that conveys confidence, empathy, and approachability.
- Conflict Navigation through Communication: Utilising advanced communication skills to mediate conflict and guide teams towards resolution.
Resources:
- MindTools – offers numerous articles and tools on communication skills. Explore what is useful for you, from effective written communication to listening skills and everything in between!: https://www.mindtools.com/c_CommunicationSkills.htm
- TED Talk: Julian Treasure – “How to speak so that people want to listen”: https://www.ted.com/talks/julian_treasure_how_to_speak_so_that_people_want_to_listen
- Article: “Four Ways to Communicate with More Empathy” – Harvard Business Review: https://hbr.org/2022/08/4-ways-to-communicate-with-more-empathy
Elevating Relational Trust in Leadership:
For school leaders, building relational trust involves establishing a school-wide culture of trust through:
- Leading with Transparency and Integrity: Demonstrating consistent ethical behaviour and fostering open communication.
- Empowering and Distributing Leadership: Trusting staff with autonomy and fostering shared ownership.
- Strategic Vulnerability: Demonstrating appropriate vulnerability to encourage shared learning and support.
- Navigating Difficult Conversations with Empathy and Courage: Addressing challenging issues directly and with empathy.
- Building Trust with Diverse Communities: Adapting communication and engagement strategies to build meaningful partnerships.
- Accountability and Follow-Through: Consistently following through on commitments.
- Systemic Approaches to Trust Building: Implementing school-wide initiatives that promote trust.
Resources:
- Article: “The Trust Factor” – Educational Leadership (ASCD): https://www.ascd.org/el/articles/the-trust-factor
- Video: Brené Brown – “The power of vulnerability” (TED Talk) – while not education-specific, offers valuable insights into building trust through vulnerability: https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_the_power_of_vulnerability
Task:
Reflecting on Communication and Trust in Practice:
Consider a recent situation where effective communication significantly contributed to building or maintaining relational trust within your school, or conversely, where a communication challenge impacted trust.
Discuss with a trusted colleague (in this programme is ideal) the key communication strategies employed (or not employed) and their impact on the level of trust. Post a summary of your discussion and key insights on the forum (150 words maximum).
Assessment:
- Completion of all readings.
- Participation in the online forum discussion.
- Conversation with colleage and subsequent post on forum
6 Responses
In our Cook Islands context, leaders are often expected to maintain composure and authority, yet as Brené Brown reminds us, showing humility and openness builds stronger relational trust. I’ve found that even small gestures such as greeting parents in reo Māori Kuki Airani, using humour, or taking time to listen to their stories can break barriers and show genuine care. It’s in these informal moments, whether during kai kai after a meeting or casual conversations outside the classroom, that relationships deepen and mutual respect is strengthened.
This aligns with Julian Treasure’s idea that effective speaking is about connection, not just content. In our schools, trust grows when communication carries warmth, respect, and cultural authenticity when we speak with people, not at them. Practising akara ki mua (looking ahead) in how we communicate helps us anticipate the needs of others, while taokotai (unity) reminds us that true leadership is about collaboration and collective growth. This is the essence of Cook Islands leadership guiding with heart, humility, and shared purpose to uplift our community.
As a Team Leader and Associate Principal, I recently experienced how intentional communication can strengthen relational trust within my team. During a planning meeting, I applied Julian Treasure’s “HAIL” principles-Honesty, Authenticity, Integrity, and Love, from his TED Talk “How to Speak so that People Want to Listen.” Communicating with openness encouraged others to share ideas freely, creating meaningful dialogue and mutual respect. Mind Tools reinforces that trust grows through consistency, transparency, and active listening, which I practiced by valuing each team member’s input.
This experience deepened my understanding of leadership within the Cook Islands context, where taokotai (unity) and angaanga pakari (working diligently together) are vital in building trust. It reminded me that effective leadership communication is relational listening with empathy, speaking with integrity, and leading with respect. These principles continue to guide my growth as a leader committed to fostering trust and collaboration across our school community.
In my leadership role, I am constantly reminded that communication is never “one size fits all.” A recent situation with students and parents highlighted this. When addressing students in assembly, I begin with a prayer to establish formality, unity, and cultural grounding. This signals respect and sets a tone of seriousness. However, in a parent meeting, I adapted by using Cook Islands Māori expressions that conveyed aroa (love), akakoromaki (patience), and even humour, which made the interaction warmer and more relational. This contrast showed me how important contextual agility is for school leaders.
In conversation with a colleague, we considered how this adaptability either strengthens or weakens trust. Brené Brown’s ideas on vulnerability connected well with our discussion. Too often in our culture, leaders avoid admitting mistakes for fear of appearing weak, but in reality, openness and honesty signal integrity and create trust.
Julian Treasure’s TED Talk also shaped my reflection. He emphasizes that speaking is not about delivering facts but about connection. I realised that in my situation, being overly formal with parents might have created distance, but showing empathy and speaking with a bit more care built relational trust. My colleague also pointed out that when leaders become defensive or avoidant, trust breaks down quickly.
From this reflection, I see that effective communication as a leader is about more than clarity. It is about being authentic, empathetic, and consistent across different contexts. Whether speaking to staff, students, or parents, the way I listen, adapt, and show vulnerability is directly tied to building the relational trust that underpins positive school culture.
Any feedback?
Thank you for sharing such a powerful reflection. I really appreciated how you highlighted the importance of contextual agility and how communication shifts across audiences from students to parents while remaining grounded in Cook Islands values of aroa and akakoromaki. Your integration of cultural practice, such as opening with prayer, reflects strong cultural intelligence and respect, which are vital for building trust in our school communities.
I also connected with your point about vulnerability in leadership, linking to Brené Brown’s view that openness strengthens integrity. This aligns with my own learning that authentic communication helps create psychological safety and deeper relational trust. Your reflection reinforces Julian Treasure’s message that communication is ultimately about connection, not just clarity.
Overall, your example beautifully illustrates how culturally responsive, empathetic communication fosters trust, unity, and shared purpose within our Cook Islands educational context.
Thank you for your reflection Ben, I really like how you grounded your insights in both the course content and our Cook Islands cultural context. A few things stood out to me:
Contextual Agility – You made a strong point about how the setting shapes our approach. Using pe’e, turou or pure in assembly not only engages students but also reinforces identity and respect. Shifting your tone and language when speaking with parents shows that you’re intentional about connection, which is at the heart of agility.
Trust and Vulnerability – I appreciate how you linked Brené Brown’s idea of “taking the armor off” to our own cultural values and sayings. Sometimes we do see admitting mistakes as weakness, but your examples (“Me kore te aroa kare te tangata e kite i te mamae o te ta’i”, and “E piri ana te tangata ki tangata” highlight that empathy and togetherness are already part of who we are as Cook Islanders and your absolutely right. That’s what builds trust.
Julian’s TED Talk Connection – Your insight that the situation was handled in a “dogmatic way” is sharp. It shows that you are reflecting critically, not just repeating theory. I liked how you contrasted speaking as just sharing facts with speaking as connecting with people. That’s a powerful shift and really ties back to the purpose of communication.
Overall, your sharing weaves together theory, culture, and practice really well. Maybe one next step to think about is: how can you keep practising vulnerability in small ways, so it feels less “unnatural” and more part of your everyday leadership style?
Meitaki ra for your reflective piece of writing.
Kia Orana tatou katoatoa,
A situation at school happened when we, the SLT (Senior Leadership Team), met to plan the week. We talked about timetables, student movement, events, staff on leave, and other important matters like pastoral care, curriculum, and the day-to-day running of the school.
Later in the week, another SLT member and I found out that an event had been scheduled and shared with the public and parents without our knowledge.
We weren’t sure if we had discussed this in the SLT meeting. I felt embarrassed because when other staff asked us about the event, we didn’t know what to say. It made us look unprofessional. This shows problems with communication, messages need to be clear, consistent, and shared on time. The way this was handled felt disrespectful, and when we spoke up. I worried the problem would get worse if it wasn’t fixed.
On the other hand, communication can also build trust. One example is when I was told I could MC the school assembly. Being new to the school, this gave me confidence. Being encouraged with words like “you have the voice,” “you have the cultural aspect,” and “you are a Cook Islander” made me feel proud and acknowledged.
Just a sharing on the notes on Module three, contextual Agility, speaking to students in assembly is different from meeting parents. In assembly, I set the tone with a pe’e or turou (traditional chant) or even with a pure (prayer) to keep students engaged and the program formal. When talking with parents, especially Cook Islands locals, I use my language to show feelings like excitement, frustration, or happiness while keeping respect.
Part 2: discussion.
I talked to a colleague about the first issue and we agreed on how it affected trust. Brené Brown says being honest about our feelings, what she calls vulnerability, is important for building trust. Going back to Module 1 where she talks about ‘taking the armor off’, and leading with authenticity, as Cook Islanders, we sometimes think admitting mistakes is weak, but it can actually build trust. I’m not naturally vulnerable like she describes, but I can understand and share feelings with others. We say: “Me kore te aroa, kare te tangata e kite i te mamae o te ta’i” (one cannot see another’s pain without empathy) and “E piri ana te tangata ki tangata” (people cling to one another). These values or sayings/teachings help us build trust.
After watching Julian’s TED Talk, I realised the situation was handled in a dogmatic way, with opinions shared as facts and excuses made, instead of being honest, fair, and caring. Julian reminded me that speaking is not just about facts, but about connecting with people.
This is the end of my sharing.
Meitaki maata.
Komakoma mai kua roa ake nei.